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theZEBRA Lick Those Stripes! I Be Gallopin' After Ye The Herd Zebra Poo Black Stripes, White Stripes Songs of the Plains
Family Court One would be in less danger From the wiles of a stranger If one's own kin and kith Were more fun to be with. Ogden Nash | Dude, Where’s My Money? Sunday. 6.6.04 10:12 am ‘cking hell. I think I just lost 50 bucks. I was at an ATM machine last evening and tried to withdraw some money. Everything went fine…at first. The machine went beep-click-whirr and spit out my ATM card along with my transaction statement, but goddamn if it refused to fork my money over as well. I kicked it then, but only succeeded in bruising my toes. Christ, did it think it was being funny? Was I the victim of some sick twisted joke the evil hunk of metal had meticulously planned out? Bloody hell, that was my money! I could have done a frillion things with 50 bucks, like: - bought the Darkness’s album - or watched Van Helsing five more times - or bribed my way out of a speeding ticket - or purchased 50 bucks’ worth of paper clips to link into an elaborate suit of armor - or extended my Lego family to include women, cattle and intact horsies - or got half an iguana from Pets Wonderland - or eaten 50 a-buck-each durians - or gorged myself on Maui Brownie Madness and Old Fashioned Butter Pecan - or settled my medical bill after eating too much ice cream and durians - or paid Milê to kiss Joel…but he seems willing to do that for free tho - or added another 10 cars to my Hot Wheels collection. My life (and Joel’s) could have been enriched in so many ways, but now these things will never come to pass. I am hollow. And I wish the ATM machine eternity in the Junkyard of Hell for this. 6 Comments. Other things to do with 50 bucks.... hmmm???
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