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theZEBRA Is Chewing On  Creation Gore Vidal Listening to:  Everything in Transit Jack's Mannequin Lick Those Stripes! I Be Gallopin' After Ye The Herd Zebra Poo Black Stripes, White Stripes Songs of the Plains
Family Court One would be in less danger From the wiles of a stranger If one's own kin and kith Were more fun to be with. Ogden Nash | It's WAR Friday. 2.10.06 1:47 pm I’m in luck. For the past week, Housemate P and I had been silently warring. It was a battle of wills, fierce and intense. But I prevailed, because the loser had to take out the trash. When I first moved in on Monday, the garbage bin in the kitchen was already full. An empty Absolut bottle sat a good four inches above the brim, proclaiming itself as King of the heap. Obviously, HP would empty the bin soon, because nothing in it belonged to me. I was wrong. A carton of chopped spinach and a Coke bottle soon joined the Absolut. Then an egg carton, a milk bottle and a greasy paper bag that used to contain pie. By Wednesday, we had to whisper in the kitchen, because anything louder would cause an avalanche of trash. “The bin,” I whispered to HP when we bumped into each other by the fridge. “It’s rather full, isn’t it?” “Hmm.” “What do you think we should do about it?” “Well,” he tossed at me challengingly. “I reckon someone should take it outside.” “Hmm. Someone should.” That night, the kitchen stank of the remains of someone’s vindaloo dinner. He was obviously trying to pong me into submission. Well, two could play at that game. I popped open an expired can of tuna that had been left in the cupboard and dumped it (carefully) onto the pile. By Thursday, no one could cook in the kitchen. Or rather, HP couldn’t cook, while I couldn’t heat up a frozen pie in the oven. I was beginning to regret the tuna. But there was no way I would lose. Because the one who backed down would obviously be forced to assume the role of Janitor for the rest of the year. And if he thought that I was gonna be cleaning up after him, he was sadly, fucking mistaken. This morning, I was awoken by someone dragging and thumping suitcases into the previously empty room next to mine. A new housemate. Curses. About an hour later, I walked into the kitchen to find HP staring in astonishment at an empty garbage bin. He looked up as I approached, “Did you…?” “Nope.” We grinned at each other. We had found our Janitor. Categories: My Awesomeness [t], Perth [t] 23 Comments. you are such a mean person! but then again you will never be as mean as me!!! muah hahahhahahah! » jase (203.121.0.19) on 2006-02-10 01:44:51 jase: Well, I did have two years to learn from you. And you do realise who will end up as Janitor when you move in with Fred, Min, and Chiam, right? *Smirks* » theZEBRA on 2006-02-10 02:18:06 Poor soul. I almost hate you for doing that, but I secretly think you rule. Besides, I hate the first roomie more. » Laynie (219.95.174.23) on 2006-02-10 07:31:14 Laynie: Thanks. :D However, I think your hate for HP will pale in comparison to the Janitor's feelings for us in the near future. » theZEBRA on 2006-02-10 09:44:16 Darlin, you're supposed to tell us aboutthe roommates! Who is hot? Who is not! And most importantly, who is available for me! Paul » Paul (203.144.143.2) on 2006-02-10 11:21:20 dammit, i'm the one throwing thrash out in my house. more of rubbish lugging and i'm going to pop a vein. and my housemate is going to get more than an earful, the twat. » bUttsH4k3r (62.252.224.16) on 2006-02-10 11:49:37 Remind me to never ever do a Will & Grace with you. A war like that would drive me absolutely bonkers. » Jay (217.37.171.17) on 2006-02-10 01:10:13 D@mn janitor . . . spoiling the fun. I was hoping that the garbage woulld spill out. » KE (219.94.118.101) on 2006-02-10 07:20:23 Right on. Fight the power. Next on your list should be who gets the lovely job of scrubs the toilet and shower stalls. Heh! » Shan (202.184.53.98) on 2006-02-10 08:29:33 Paul: Luv, you're welcome to have them all. Another new one just arrived, an ex-army boy who drinks soy milk and goes out for 7.30am jogs. I've got my eye on some of the lads at soccer practice. :D buttsH4k3r: All you needed was a little self-restraint, but I fear 'tis too late. You're the Janitor! Jay: What's the point of having a pretty face if it doesn't bring in trash-discarding boyfriends? KE: If that had happened, it'd still end the same way - with the Janitor cleaning it up.
Shan: Interestingly, the toilet floor was all sparkly today...
pelf: Right, I don't think I'll resort to that just yet... AJ: I'll deal with it when the day comes. In the meantime, he's been throwing the trash out DAILY and CLEANING the shelves. So I don't think he could bear messing up the floors. pelf: I can't access your site!!! This crapsucking uni connection gives me only a certain amount of time to access certain sites, and yours is apparently one of them! I need to wait for my quota to be be refreshed. Patience, luv. Katy Newton: There can only be ONE Bin Warrior! I challenge ye to a duel!
souplad: *Salutes*
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